How to HATE a Book!
Posted By ron on May 30, 2008
I never thought I’d say this. I LOVE to read, I’m surrounded by books in my office and throughout my house. But in the past 14 hours, I’ve grown to hate a book. The tough part is that it’s one of MY books. I’m getting it ready for the Colorado Gold contest, so I won’t say anything about the book except that I HATE IT!
Why, you ask? This book has been “done” for a while. I’m doing a little bit of tweaking, but hey, you know how it is. A writer can make a project last FOREVER if he (or she) wants to. My marvelous critique group (Nancy, Vicki, Mike, Rick, Jodie, Claire, Charlie, Dave, et al) have ripped it to shreds for rebuilding a number of times. It’s hot! It’s ready!
Now I need an 8 page synopsis. Therein, the discovery of how to hate a book. OK, so I shouldn’t have waited this close to deadline. My BAD. OK, you never, ever try to come up with a finished work on first draft. (OK, I do it hundreds of times a year. I LIVE for FINAL first drafts. – Maybe THAT’s why I don’t have a Maserati in my driveway.) Knocking out a synopsis in one sitting is not only STUPID, it’s INSANE. At the end of page 1, I felt good. Still going strong at three and four. THEN OMG! How can I call this a [genre censored] when it doesn’t have a [scene description appropriate to genre] scene in chapter 22. It’s gotta have it. The book is RUINED without it. Each word I typed in the synopsis made me hate this terrible, worthless book even more.
Then I came up with a solution. I got up. I put my computer into hibernate mode. I reached for a glass, some ice, and that bottle with all the red wax around the top.
I’m cooking!
ttfn, rlc
I HATE BOOKS!!!! I hate them so much I want to [removed by editor]!!!